Friends are the People That Know Your Flaws but Like you Anyways

My friends are my saviors. I have had very few friend survive thus far, and most of them I met my freshman year. Sky is in her second year of college, and she graduated my freshman year, the same year we met. My friend T.C graduated with her, and I met him through her. Those two are my angels. They have been there for me through thick and thin and have saved me more times than they know. I love them both to death. They're like my older siblings.

My ex boyfriend, Adam, also graduated with them, and he and I still talk from time to time. Most of my relationships end with friendship. My friend Svennewitz and I are pretty close. He's more like my older brother now.

My friend Mady and I have been friends since 8th grade. She's a year younger than me, but she's like my sister. She knows practically everything about me, and I go to her for advice a lot of the time. She and I have had our fair share of fights, though. But the best friends are the ones that you can swear at till your face is blue and they'll still forgive you. I have a few good friends like that. Even though I tend to try not to take my anger out on them, even when they tell me I can. I don't like to let off steam on my friends.

My current boyfriend has been my friend for over two years now, but we have had more than our fair share of fights. He's very jealous, and he's liked me since he met me, or so he claims. Every time I dated someone else we would fight. But we always made up, so I think he has potential.

I look for friends that are honest, loyal, caring, kind, smart and sweet. I have alot more friends that are guys than girls, and alot of them have liked me at one point or another. I've dated a couple of them but some of them just don't appeal to me. It's not them personally but it's my preferences and the way I was raised.

I also look for things in common. Music is my main one. But I also look for common hobbies/intrests. It's an interesting experience. I also look for people who are different from myself, because then I can learn from them and maybe find something I like.

I have lost many friends over the years, but it doesn't bother me much. Most of them either were never really my friends or we just grew apart. Some of them have hurt me, but I think that just makes me that much stronger.

My friends mean alot to me, and while I didn't mention everyone, they are like my family. I practically consider them my siblings. I love them to death, and while they may be at college or preoccupied with their own lives, I miss them and I will always be here for them. I will always listen to my friends, and try to help them in any way I can. They are appreciated, whether they know it or not.

Consider yourself schooled in the way that is me.
Signing off,

Xx~WesternWriter~xX

My Best Subject

School isn't my favorite thing in the world, but then again, what sixteen year old girl wants to be couped up in a smallish room with at least three people that hate her? I've always had problems with school because I'm different. I don't conform to their standards. I don't dress like they do, I don't act like they do, and I certainly DO NOT play by their rules. And they hate me for it. In seventh grade, when I first came to this school, I was told by someone, in her exact words I quote, "We were all a big happy family until you showed up." I just laughed at her. I've seen the way this school works, and I've been here long enough to know that there is no way in hell that that statement was true. No, this school had it's problems. I was the least of them.

In eigth grade I had trouble with people teasing me for my love of horses. They made posters that consisted of drawings of hamburgers that said "Free horse meat." I was followed down the hall with shouts of "I'm going to shoot your horse and kill your cat." That was a favorite, too. My mom came in and spoke with the principle after a teacher asked me if I would skin a horse and live in if I was freezing in the wild. My answer was to walk out of class. I screamed the F word at a kid that called my horse stupid, in the middle of class. I ended up apologizing to the teacher in the room we were walking by. I had one kid go as far as to email me pictures of dead horses. I don't use that email anymore. Another kid, the one that started it, would pull up pictures of dead cats and horses, strung up by their necks and/or nailed to trees or posts. He even described in great detail how he would kill my cat. I never admitted where I lived after that.

Other than the taunts of killing my animals, I was called names as well. I've been called a whore, a slut, and everything else in the book. Even though I was none of those things, they still thought it was funny to spread rumors. A popular one was that I was cheating on my first boyfriend, Adam. They said I was kissing a good friend of mine, Dylan, in the hall. I hugged all my guy friends, everyone knew that. But they took it to the next level. At that time I was in tenth grade, and on the cheer squad. They had the nerve to ask me to stop hanging out with Dylan. They had the nerve to tell me that I couldn't hang out with one of my best friends anymore. I hated them for it. I never had many friends on the cheer squad, and was kicked off the following year. They told me that "We, as cheerleaders, already have a bad reputation for being sluts, and we would appreciate it if you didn't do anything to confirm this." Meanwhile the coaches' sister is grinding on the other girls and doing inappropriate dance moves fit for a whore. To say this made me angry was an understatement. Also, the coaches deemed me unfit for the state competition, when I was better than a girl that went. That same girl became "Junior captain" the next year, when she's a full year younger than me and seniority is supposed to rule. The coach always hated me, and I have no doubt she still does. I loved the sport, hated the team.

My best subject in school has always been English. I have a talent for writing, not just poetry but stories, too. I love to write. In an English essay at the beginning of my junior year, I decscirbed my passion for writing in a personal narrative titled "The Fire Within" about "An experience with fire." I used the fire of loving something, the passion, as my hypothetical, "Fire." Like my drive to do it. I explained how my writing was brought out by my cutting. My narrative was voted one of the best. A lot of my classmates didn't know that about me. I'm pretty open about it now.

My worst subjects pretty much included everything else. I am not very athletic, and therefor I struggled in Gym. I'm not very good with numbers, so I have a hard time with math. Science doesn't appeal to me, and I find it boring. History is fine as long as it's U.S history. I never cared much about the rest of the world.

When I go to college I'm hoping to get a degree in elementary education. I have loved working with kids since I was one myself. When I was small I taught my little brother when we played school. I taught myself to read at the age of three. I love to baby sit and I'm now working with special ed kids over at the elementary. I struggled with elementary school and I watched my little brother struggle as well. I want to give the future kids of America a good start so that they learn to love school. I always believed a good start would affect them for the rest of their lives. I want to be able to make that difference.

Well, that's my school life.
Consider yourself schooled in the way that is me.
Signing off,

Xx~WesternWriter~xX